How to have a heatlhy marriage
Looking back, at nearly 14 years, Its clear to see Gods hand in my marriage. When I got married I remember thinking that my husband had SO many things he needed to change in order for our marriage to work. I thought that I knew best and I remember trying to fit him into this perfect mold that I thought a husband should be. I can laugh at it now, but looking back we were both so head strong! Neither of us wanted to change and we both believed that we were right. Now we see that we both had a lot of learning and growing to do.
In fact, I was raised in a Christian home and thought I knew God and how everyone was suppose to act. I knew what I did and didn't want in a man...or so I thought...and I was bound and determined to fit my dear Tony into that mold! Can any of you relate? Come on, be real with me for a minute...we all have!
The reality was, I needed to change! God had to get a hold of me and heal me from the inside out and he had to do the same with my husband BUT on his terms not mine!
Its been a journey but as soon as I stopped nagging and I started on my journey of surrender, God started doing something amazing in my life, my husbands life and in our girls!
You see the fact is ladies, that God doesn't need our help in shaping the Godly leader of our homes...he just needs our heart, our trust in him, our surrender and he will take care of the rest!
Can I encourage you, that though the road may seem long, its well worth the journey!
Below is a letter that my dear husband sent to me and the girls this morning and it was too powerful to share.
God is just getting started with our family and this letter meant so much to me and I pray it will speak to your heart and into your marriage as well.
~ As my Team and I walked home from dinner tonight, an elderly couple passed by us carrying a bag full of groceries the man was holding one handle of the bag and the woman held the other. They were speaking softly to each other almost as if one was encouraging the other to continue. Missing my wife, it made me smile to see the two of them supporting each other and made me realize that as we continue to grow in our marriage, many of the tasks that we take for granted today will require more teamwork to accomplish in the years to come. As I looked back at them, I was reminded of these verses that Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes.
9 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. 10 If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? 12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Reading the scripture, you realize that life was not meant to be lived alone…we are better together. However, at the end of verse 12 Solomon writes something that was not in line with the previous rules of two. He wrote, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” this verse shows that the two do not derive thier success solely from their ability to work together, rather their ability to entwine God (the third strand) into the very fiber of thier relationship.
In an effort to stay unbroken…the answer is Christ
---WOW ladies, that's God at work! Allow him to be entwined in the very fiber of your marriage. Don't focus on the how to or the outcome, simply remain in surrender to him and claim him as the center even if your spouse doesn't see it yet. One day, in God's perfect timing, he will. Don't give up!