Mom's, have you ever been frustrated with your kids?
Have you ever found yourself totally frustrated with your kids? I'm sure I can't be alone on this one. I mean there has to be another mom our there who has stopped an argument between their kids simply to silence the noise and later realized that you missed the perfect opportunity to teach a very important lesson or simply to open your ears and truly hear them out.
In these moments it's easy to beat yourself up and feel like a failure as a mother but can I just encourage you that your NOT a failure! Being a parent isn't easy, especially when you are truly trying to be the best parent that you can be. So before you read on, please stop, take a DEEP breathe and say this with me... I AM a wonderful mother! I love my kids dearly and they love me!...Now please repeat that daily, especially on those days when you are convinced that you are not doing this whole parenting thing right. :)
I, just like many of you as I can imagine, have found myself frustrated more often then not. I have even found myself questioning whether or not I was a good mother or if my girls would grow up and want to be my friend. Then it hit me, my girls are growing up and their little personalities are evolving, yet at their core, they are who they are and God made them all uniquely different! So I have been working on speaking to them in a way that is more encouraging and supportive of who they are. Its not always easy to realize that each of my girls are totally different, their love language is different and so is the way they receive every word that I say to them. I think it is so easy to set expectations for our kids to act like us, feel like us and see things like we see them because that's all we know but that's not effective. Depending their personalities, our kids will all be different and will require their own set of understanding.
I am reading this book The Five Love Languages of Children and love their site. If you find yourself frustrated with your kids to often or if you have children at all, then I highly suggest their book to any parent as well as their site. http://www.5lovelanguages.com/resource/the-five-love-languages-of-children/
My goal is to show my children love DAILY. To seek out who they truly are and to speak in a way that uplifts them even when I don't feel like. I want my girls to be courageous and confident in who they are so they can dream big and live an abundant life. Again I am still not perfect, in fact just yesterday I found myself so frustrated with one of my daughters after she tried to put the clothes that I had told her to fold back into the laundry room...sounds so silly even as a type it out but it made me so angry that she would do that just so she could get what she wanted even faster. After walking away I realized that I must give her room to make mistakes and this was one of them and a small one at that, so instead of making her feel like she was totally wrong I had to share with her why that was not the right choice. However when I came back in the room and before I could even speak, she made it right and asked for my forgiveness. Of course I forgave her but I also let her know that we all make mistakes and that's how we learn and that the important thing was that she had learned from the mistake and she made it right and for that I was proud of her. For the rest of the evening she glowed! Her spirit was so lifted and it was so refreshing and reassuring to see.
One last share for the mom who has a child that is NOT a morning person because yes, I have one of those too. In fact she gets it from me, go figure!:) As I walked up the stairs this morning to wake her up I prepared myself with sweet words of affirmation about my daughter. I know it may sound silly and like it wouldn't change a thing but trust me it does. I reminded myself how sweet and kind she is, how much I loved her exactly the way she is and that it was ok that she was not a morning person. Simply by speaking all of those positive things about her before I open that door, it changed my outlook and I was ready to face what ever attitude came out of her as she woke up. It also changed the way I woke her up because I put myself in her shoes and thought about how she would like to be woken up. So I laid beside her, gave her a little kiss and said good morning. I wrapped my arms around her and told her how much I loved her. By doing so, I started her day with words of affirmation because I know that fills her love tank and again I seen a child that glowed...she even walked with her arm around me all the way down to the bus stop...and she is 12!
So hang in there moms, we won't always get it right and our job is definitely not easy but its always worth it! The relationships we build with our little ones are so powerful and we are the ones who can make the biggest impacts in their lives...so instead of beating ourselves up lets get creative, learn more and make this journey the best journey possible.
I would love to hear from all of my moms out there! Can you relate to any of this? Did anything speak to you? Maybe you have some girlfriends who could benefit from my page? If so I would truly appreciate your support and would love for you to comment below and share this post. Thank you in advance for your support. It is greatly appreciated.